How to Live

The journey of introspection has not been an easy one for me.

I understand why now so many people choose to stay unaware. Ignorance may just be bliss.

My journey of introspection became a journey of transformation, a journey of growth, and a journey of becoming through experimentation. What truly matters are the lessons learned along the way.

My curiosity to experiment with life began ten years ago, at a moment in life when I felt I ‘had it all’, but did not feel satisfied, content and happy, like I had expected to. To be willing to experiment with life meant accepting that I did not know how to live. Or rather I no longer wanted to buy the beliefs I had been sold my entire life until that point.

Ten years ago when I opened a door within myself, curious to see what was inside, I noticed a shift, deep within myself. My journey of introspection has been one of learning how to live, from a place of living with the lights on versus with the lights off.

There have been times of struggle, times of doubt, and times of despair. There have also been times of joy, times of discovery, and times of profound understanding. And it is in these moments, these fleeting moments of clarity and understanding, that I found my true self and my own way on how to live.

“I don’t know” are the most powerful words that I have said to myself. These words are an invitation for me to be open, to be curious, to be playful.

As I journeyed inwards, I began to understand that life is not a series of random events but a play of interconnected moments, each scene scripted into the fabric of my existence. Some are joyful, some are sad, and some are magical.

And each scene, no matter how insignificant it may seem, has its place, its purpose, its meaning. It is this understanding, this acceptance of life's inherent uncertainties, that brings about a profound sense of peace for me today.

I am not in control of life.

I am only in control of how I choose to move through life.

Living in Europe now, I have become more accustomed to hearing, listening and watching football from time-to-time. As I am not really interested in the sport, I see the game as a metaphor for how to live.

There are those that choose to sit at home, on the couch, and watch the game. This is exciting because they get to see someone else live their dream. It is sad for the same reason.

There are those who are fortunate enough to watch the game be played live in a stadium. This is exciting because they get to feel the energy, hear the sounds, experience the moment up-close. It can be inspiring and motivating, if they do something with the fire that’s been lit within.

And then there are those who are foolish enough to lace up, boot up and get on the field to play the game. They have to work tirelessly, learn how to rely on and trust others, be disappointed and be defeated more often than not, and rarely score a goal. Win or lose, they have the satisfaction of knowing they tried.

This choice, to be on the field versus in the stands or sitting at home, is a core ingredient to my philosophy of how to live. It is what motivates me and moves me.

In the quiet corners of my mind, I often contemplate the profound influence of the company I keep, the thoughts I entertain, and the environment I inhabit. It's a thought that lingers, like the subtle fragrance of a forgotten perfume, permeating the essence of my existence.

I've come to realize that the friends I choose, the colleagues I engage with, and the surroundings I immerse myself in have a significant role in shaping my perspectives and attitudes. It's a delicate dance of influence and adaptation, a constant interplay of external forces molding my internal world.

There's a certain power in consciously choosing positive influences and environments. It's akin to planting a seed in fertile soil, nurturing it with care, and watching it blossom into a beautiful flower. It's about fostering growth and positivity within myself, a process that demands mindfulness and intentionality. The same principle applies to what I allow into my mind and body. The books I read, the music I listen to, the food I consume - they all leave an imprint on my being.

My journey, like most others, has been often fraught with challenges and uncertainties.

There's a certain irony in the human condition to resist transformative experiences or changes, especially when they hold the potential for growth. I am here to grow.

As I navigate through the labyrinth of life, I often find myself grappling with internal conflicts. It's a struggle to reconcile with the various facets of life, a battle waged within the confines of my mind. Yet, it's through this struggle that I discover my strength, my resilience, my values.

Throughout this journey, I've experienced moments of revelation, instances of deep understanding that have altered my life. These moments, these climaxes in the narrative of my life, have ushered in a profound shift in my understanding of how to live. They've enlightened me, enriched me, and ultimately led me towards a deeper understanding of myself and how I choose to engage with the world.

As I reflect on my journey of introspection, I find myself arriving at a place of acceptance and understanding. I don’t know how long I will stay at this place, as I know everything is impermanent, however while I am here, I feel inspired to share how I have learned how to live so far.