How to Diwali
“When my candle is used to help light yours, mine doesn’t get any less dim but rather there is now more brightness in our world”.
Light is a symbol of celebration, and Diwali for me has become a celebration that I look forward to and cherish the most each year. Which begs the question, what am I celebrating exactly?
I grew up celebrating the Indian new year with family and friends, steeped in cultural traditions, often intertwined with colorful religious ceremonies that have become rituals I look forward to each year.
As I grew older and grew out of my childhood home, and then relocated to New York and then Lisbon, it has been telling to reflect on which childhood traditions I would retain and which ones I would shed.
The annual festival of lights has for me become a celebration of what is versus what is not.
Oftentimes in religious traditions, from any faith, the focus can easily become on asking for something we don’t have. This is the norm that I grew up with and so did those around me. Be it birthdays, calendar new year, Christmas, or Diwali, amongst siblings, cousins and friends, we’d excitedly gossip about what we asked for.
Maybe six or seven years ago, as I began to feel more connected with my own spirituality, I started to notice a rejection of this idea of using celebratory moments to ask for something.
I began to flip the script in my heart, and now use these moments to share appreciation instead. Everytime I bring my palms into a prayer in front of my heart, I find someone or something to appreciate within my heart.
Celebration is not much fun when experienced alone, and is much more joyful, energizing and meaningful when shared with others. The sharing of appreciation and gratitude with others is one of the highest forms of connection I have experienced. Connection to myself, connection with others and connection to a greater life force.
When I take even a moment to reflect on what I appreciate, the list is endless. Hearing what others appreciate spurs me to discover even more that I appreciate. It’s an infinite loop of continuous appreciation!
Now when I wish family and friends a Happy Diwali, what I am really saying is I appreciate you. And when I receive greetings from others, I hear I appreciate you. All of this warms my heart.
The candles, sparklers, fireworks and every imaginable form of light is simply a symbol of that appreciation. The spread of lightness helps put any darkness we feel or fear into perspective. It is not about eradicating darkness, as often the darkness helps us understand the lightness. It is more about putting any darkness we have in our lives into perspective. The light is a reminder that we are not alone, and the greetings from others are reminders that we are seen.
Some of my most cherished memories from childhood center around Diwali celebrations and now I better understand why these moments, more than others, continue to sit so deeply in my heart. These are the moments when my heart has felt the most connected to those around me, thanks to the spread of appreciation.
And that is how I learned to Diwali.
